Are you a donkey? Take this test and find out!
But be careful...only the first 2 are easy!
1. When you have a "read" on your opponent, you.....
A: Know what the writing on his tee-shirt says.
B: Can cleverly deduce what type of shirt he has by the little alligator on it.
C: Know within a reasonable range what cards he may be holding.
2. A C-Bet is.....
A: All the chips you "C" the other player bet.
B: All the chips you "C" in your stack.
C: A bet made post flop after a bet or raise pre-flop.
Ok, now it gets a little harder.....
3. An example of "pot odds" would be (select all that apply to POKER)
A: I cannot remember what the soup of the day is on a Monday at this casino. It's different each day, so it's seven to one that it's my favorite, chicken noodle.
B: Whether or not I pee and make it into the bowl depends greatly on how drunk I am. Right now, I'd say its 50-50 that I don't pee all over half the casino bathroom.
C: I have to call 50 to win 150, so I am getting three to one pot odds on my call.
4a. In a tournament: on the flop you are two cards away from making your straight (the bottom end). There are three cards to a straight/straight flush, so all are over-cards to your holdings, and you do not have any of the flush cards. You decide to call a flop bet way bigger than the pot, only to miss hitting any part you need on the turn. You continue to call huge bets on every street anyway, with no hand, no feasible draw, and no clue what your opponent is holding. You are.....
A: Going to make damn sure I'm not being bluffed!
B: Going to make my straight, because I have faith!
C: Totally f@$king stupid.
4b. At the showdown in the above hand, after putting almost your entire stack into the pot, YOU LOSE with 7-high, you are.....
A: Relieved! I wasn't being bluffed!
B: The un-luckiest player ever!
C: Totally f@$king stupid.
4c. At the showdown in the above hand, after putting almost your entire stack into the pot, YOU WIN with 7-high, you are.....
A: Just doing my part to keep this great game honest, as it should be!
B: The greatest player ever!
C: Totally f@$king stupid.
5. You limp in UTG with 2-9 offsuit, and then: One player raises it up big, another one calls that, another 3-bets a huge amount, and then the Big Blind 4-bets even more by going all in, and you can only call by going all in for all your money, your game and/or tourney life; You should...
A: Shove, so I make sure none of these players are bluffing me. Clearly, something is up!
B: Shove, because it's my lucky night - they were serving chicken noodle soup and I only peed all over my shoes in the casino bathroom! Plus, I think I passed this test!
C: Seriously? 2-9 UTG limp? Are you totally f@$king stupid?
How to decide if you are a donkey....If you answered all with "C", you are not. Anything other than "C" for any question, PLEASE FIND ME, I'll gladly play you anytime.
