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  1. #1
    Elite PokerOwned Member marlais's Avatar
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    Jul 2012
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    5 points and a cup of apple juice

    I go to get my blood drawn yesterday. I tell Brian the phlebotomist that I have shitty veins, they're small, and roll around when you poke at them. People usually have much better luck using a smaller gauge needle, even something like you would use for a child. He ties me off, says "see, there's one right there!" and I said "uhm..." but he had already gone for it with the garden hose-sized needle he had laid out in advance with the rest of his supplies. He misses entirely, and continues to dig around in my arm with the needle for a solid 60 seconds trying to find the vein. I must have blanched, because he was trying to distract me by saying things like "I think I almost have it...." and "this must be pretty standard for you..." and I'm thinking "usually I have a trained phlebotomist". During all of this, he never once backs the needle out, and after a minute of excruciating rummaging around under my skin with the needle I finally say STOPI'MGOINGTOFAINT and he says, triumphantly "...but I just got blood!"

    And that was how I got a free cup of apple juice and a little rest on the exam table at the doctor's office, legs elevated. It also looks like I'm going to have a pretty awesome bruise, gratis.
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  2. #2
    PokerOwned Master allheart143's Avatar
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    Jul 2012
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    ouch marlais... have the wrong person either take blood or insert an IV is horrible. That is the reason my right hand is numb from the wrist to elbow... I had a dip shit put an IV in the wrong place when I had my daughter and no matter how many times I told them it was in the wrong place they wouldn't move it left it like that for the 3 days I was in the hospital!

  3. #3
    Elite PokerOwned Member marlais's Avatar
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    When are guys gonna learn that when a girl says STOP, it means STOP?
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  4. #4
    PokerOwned Demi-God StackSnack's Avatar
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    Apr 2012
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    I had a kid do that once while ignoring me! I ended up with a bruise the size of a half dollar and he ended up with a black eye and a, "I tried to warn you"

  5. #5
    Elite PokerOwned Member marlais's Avatar
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    Jul 2012
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    Brian got off easy. When I was a little kid, I cracked my head on the coffee table and needed stitches, but was afraid of stitches so my parents told me I was going to the ER to get some butterfly bandages put on the cut. When the doc took one look and said "stitches" I kicked him in the balls, which were easily accessible from my seat on the exam table.
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  6. #6
    PokerOwned Veteran
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    Jun 2012
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    i broke my arm falling off a couch, i kicked my little bro in the balls also cuz it hurt

  7. #7
    Elite PokerOwned Member marlais's Avatar
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    The inside of my arm probably looks like ground round.
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  8. #8
    PokerOwned God jasonv12's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by marlais View Post
    When are guys gonna learn that when a girl says STOP, it means STOP?
    yeah seriously..

  9. #9
    PokerOwned Veteran Jessytp's Avatar
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    Mar 2011
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    5 points

    and a hugeeeeeeeeee cup of coffee now

  10. #10
    Experienced Member
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    Mar 2013
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    5 points and redbull ?

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