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  1. #1
    Its 2016. Poker is Dead NeilZelkin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    510

    Time to cut the cord Kid!!

    Its been a long day for a couple of reasons. But at this point I think I have proven a couple things to myself over the last several hours.

    1) Merge still sucks. Got bounceing in both tourney's I played with AK suited. To lesser hands.

    2) Poker is a sinister bitch. Even when making the hero calls and posting money finish after money finish we are all on the precipice of donkdom if not careful. In the last six hours I have morphed from a mediocre grinder into some sort of ugly combination that is equal parts masochistic, retarded and erratic totaling one big pile of shit. Limping into hands from early position, calling into a big raise chasing a gut shot or flush, failing to convert continuation bets at the right moment, pushing from early position with a little pocket pair, and all the other shit I did back in 2008 when Poker was a new and strange pastime pushing its way into my life for the first time.

    3) How is it possible for the internet to have smell-o-vision. Because I swear to God it is just like in the wild or a when scared white guy tries to buy rocks in the hood for the first time, every move I made was jammed right back up my ass with emphasis. I felt like a wounded gazelle on the savannah with a pride of lions eyeing my every move. Not out of respect but with the sole purpose of eventually devouring for their morning meal. And devoured my poker playing peers you have. 1000 pts pissed away in client, two early exits on Merge, a quick $5 playing PLO on juicy, bubbling a two hour drag on BCP---U people smell blood and the blood is mine. So no more blood. Fuck you smell-o-vision.

    4) Poker is a game of uncertainity best beaten through ones ability to control or appear to control what is ultimately uncertain. Its a paradox hiding in a box eating its curds and weigh. And the only thing I can or appear to control right now is the bong going from my table to my lips and back on the table.

    5) WTF was I thinking when I put in words in a post the mention a winning 10 llbs in a row? The black clouds started forming the minute I launched that post into the virtual universe.
    So no more Neil's charitable chip trust handing out money and poker chips to any player willing to do one very little thing, play a poker hand against me. The window is closed. Adios.
    Last edited by NeilZelkin; 10-14-2013 at 08:09 PM.

  2. #2
    Team PO Pro sickread23's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    1,683
    Neil, your creative writing is interesting to say the least. I find you to be very amusing. Stick around... If you just put in a little work, I am sure that you can become an above average player.

  3. #3
    Its 2016. Poker is Dead NeilZelkin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    510
    Its funny but I got some sleep. Reset my brain and Whala.... Two ITM finishes in a row.

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